Last night I lost it a bit. Couldn't stop crying. Not feeling ANYTHING whatsoever and pretty convinced this month was a bust too. Today I went to the pharmacy to pick up our Femara to try again next cycle, because I will prob get my period while we are out of town for the holidays and we will need it on day 2.
I hate, hate, hate to sound like a brat - because I see wonderful women on the message boards everyday who have been trying for a lot longer than we have with no luck either - but WTF?!? What are we doing wrong? It wasn't supposed to be this hard, considering that we have medicalized this process from the beginning. 3 - 4 cycles, max. Now, I realize much of this process is out of everyone's/anyone's hands, but c'mon --> It's supposed to be SCIENCE!
It must be me. My sh*t doesn't work and I am throwing thousands and thousands of dollars down the toilet. Dollars we don't have. I am as barren as the gd Sahara desert. Nothing can survive in me. My uterus is an inhospitable wasteland, just like my soul.
 |
| My gd uterus. And soul. |
Well, f*ck you universe. Blow it out your f*cking ass.
>:/ N
Ugh! I have nothing comforting to say, but lots of support. This whole process does suck, and the most frustrating part is not knowing when it's going to be over. It's still early enough, though, that you could be pg. I hope so. And if not, I hope you have one hell of a kick-ass NYE.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for the ride yesterday!
ReplyDelete<3 a million times over!
i still have a good feeling about this cycle for you guys. also, i lol'd about your soul.
ReplyDeleteyou should prob watch the lunar eclipse. according to jezebel, astrologer susan miller says eclipses often signal endings, such as pregnancy (which is the beginning of one life, but the end of yours as you know it). sooooo...better go let the lack of moonlight shine on yr ladybits for a few minutes! or at least lay by the window ;)
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