In the 2WW.

That means "2 week wait," y'all. It's what I am in, right now -- the 2 weeks between the date you inseminate/ovulate and the date you can use a HPT (home pregnancy test). When you use that HPT you hope to see a BFP (big fat positive) and not a BFN (big fat negative) on the damn thing. I have learned TONS and TONS of fun new acronyms since TTC (trying to conceive). Here's one list to give you an example: fertility acronyms & abbreviations

Anywho, it is 9DPI (9th day post insemination) and I have been feeling really sad and frustrated over the past few days. D can attest to this, since I seem to fluctuate between crying and stopping crying only long enough to be pissy with her about something. Because I know what changes happened in my body month #2 - the month we had a chemical pregnancy - I now expect to "feel things" around the 7th or 8th DPI, and if I don't "feel things" then I am convinced it didn't work. I know it is still too early to "call it," but I think we were not successful this time either and I'm so sad/furious/worried/frustrated/broken-hearted, etc. Our money is running out. Our Dr. is going to want us to move on to injectables. My body is totally beat up and my mind is exhausted from monitoring everything I eat, drink, think, and do.   


D and I have no luck. We are not lucky people. But we could really use a little luck right now. Just a little. Just one good egg, one good sperm... 


I need to qualify that. D and I have been lucky in love. We found each other, lost each other, and found each other again, and though we have done a lot of hard work, I would still say that we are very, very lucky. So maybe I should quit feeling sorry for myself, eh?
Probably. 


But this still really effin' SUCKS.


♥ N